And I bet that old asshole pitches a 12-foot-high rainbow with backspin. Damn those old assholes, with their decades of experience and training and being better than me at softball. Assholes.

I play co-ed rec league softball, but it’s typically kids in their 20s, 30s, and 40s. For the first time last night we faced a batter in his 60s, and we could not for the life of us get that old fucker out. He probably looked out at the field and thought Imma splash these whippersnapper motherfuckers, because he put…

Who the FUCK FaceTimes in a gym locker room? Jesus Christ, people are the goddamn worst. I (a lady) once encountered a bachelorette party in the gym locker room, there for one of those pole-lates classes, and the bride’s mother was taking photos. I, standing there in a towel, was like “EXCUSE ME, NO PHOTOS IN THE…

If I came home and found my ex-gfs sitting around drinking MY tea and my wife and daughter are missing, I’d probably first ask them what gives them the right to just take MY TEA.  You couldn’t ask first?  You knew that was the tea that I bought for myself for when I get stressed out, but you just went ahead and took…

Last guy could have named his cat Kitty Purry, and if nothing else, he would have dominated the star count at Jezebel’s “Saturday Night Social” thread.

Baltimore as a team feels like the Masters to me. They are usually on CBS. Jim Nance is talking. It’s a boring affair, while the announcers make comments about “the right way” and “leaders of men” throughout the broadcast. It’s usually on in the late afternoon on a Sunday, and it’s an effective background noise to…

“Ravens’ fans current favorite son is a Floridian who obstructed a fucking murder.”

Ray Lewis is a murderer.  Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

Ravens’ fans current favorite son is a Floridian who obstructed a fucking murder.

This post could easily be renamed Why Your Suburb Sucks: Dundalk

“Nobody in the history of good football has ever held the pig skin like this.”

I also like how players just seem to be randomly placed through the field on his run.

“They forget you've gotta win," said the Cleveland Browns quarterback.

Probably not a great sign than Spanfeller, as the head of several media outlets, barely understands Twitter.

If this becomes a generic sports website, I. AM. OUT.

I don’t think he’s actually all that self confident.

It’s a recurring thought exercise of mine to imagine what and where Trump would be if he hadn’t inherited the fortune, business, and political connections of his stupendously wealthy father. I keep coming back to this:

It’s called Monty Burns syndrome. Surround yourself with yes men, and next thing you know you’re the smartest person in the room, even though you are far from it. Simpsons did it!

Given today’s news, I wanted to voice my appreciation for this post that is decidedly not about sports.