"My husband is from Italy, and if I judged him based on the words that he misuses in our English language he wouldn't be here today."

"I gave her a lightshow"

I came home early from work sick. Walked in on my boyfriend and some blonde in the act. In our bed. I closed the door quietly, then started throwing everything he owned over them balcony and into the pool. His iPod, cell phone, x box, top shelf booze, whatever. Then he came out of the bedroom and tried to apologize…

I'd been with my husband for eight years - we were best friends and I loved him madly. Out of nowhere, he tells me he doesn't love me anymore. "I need to think about *myself* right now." I was devastated and definitely had not seen it coming. I tried to pick his brain and get to the root of the problem, to no…

I came home from work to find my ex-boyfriend passed out in G in the living room, wearing nothing but a pink cockring along with a man in a leather harness watching the Vicar of Dirbly on TV. At least the man was nice enough to stick around to babysit my ex.

Well I guess that answers the question "who listens to this crap???"

actually women at any age into casual hook up, kids

I remember when I heard "Back to Black." Before the first chorus, I thought: this woman won't live to 30. There was too much hurt and light in her voice for her not to be immolated by her own flame, whatever it was.

I wish people would stop 'coming out' as polyamorous, as though merely being chafed by the constraints of monogamy (like 99 percent of monogamous and non-monogamous people alike) were comparable in any way to being attacked and debased and stripped of rights for being gay. I'm sorry your mom frowns at the thought of…

Furthermore equating Evolution with Progress is a highly insidious misunderstanding of evolution. Evolution simply adapts organisms to better make use of their current living conditions (for example, a strain of tetra fish living in a totally dark cave lost the use of sight over time, this adapts them better to live…

That reminds me of a science fiction story I read as a kid. I can't remember the title or author now (Shekley maybe? Simak? whatever) but it was about a guy who was feeling sad and wandering around until he came upon a broken down spaceship. Long story short it turns out that humans were actually meant to be the…

To me, the entire field of evolutionary psychology is it's infancy at best and total bunk at worst. You can't perform any scientific study on the psychology of an austrolopithican, seeing as how their brains decomposed eons ago. We can sure uncover their bones and trinkets, but as to their psychology and values, we…

In Massachusetts, we spend a long time on our history too. But that's because we basically invented America. *flips hair*

Derek Jeter, because, New York.

Seriously. I love it when people move on to Pretentious Level Humbleness.

"By day I was this sort of mild mannered kid who nobody really saw. And by night I was listening to Charlie Parker and John Coltrane and Freddie King and Jimi Hendrix and Eric Clapton,"

In other words, she has empathy for people that are just like her.

Making a cat dance for one's life partner goes beyond the physical realm of pleasure. Slightly lifting a cat to a semi standing position and wiggling it to music is the most intimate experience two humans can share.

i was once detained by lieutenant-in-training German Shepherd puppy at the airport. She wanted my chocolate that I had in the bag. Apparently I was the fourth person she had alerted to the police for OMG DRUGS who had chocolate in their bag XD

I smushed a banana in my bag on the train in India, & was the target of a Department of Agriculture officer named Lieutenant Beagle at the Miami airport. Lieutenant Beagle was the cutest thing on 4 legs, & I was very happy to be detained by him multiple times before I left the airport (it was a slow night for illicit…