First they came for the Muslims and we said STEP the FUCK OFF.

After reading the headline, I was hoping that he was the prostitute.

I think they got the message from Deadspin entirely mixed up. Yes, Friday is for good bears, but that wasn’t a sign to have the other six days reserved for bad ones.

Their conditioning program involved prostitution? There goes their last avenue for gaining recruits.

Or that the staff intern who fetches everyone coffee murdered a high school classmate or three and got away with it.

This was a woman consenting to using her body in a sexual manner, and that’s not the Baylor way.

“We only believe in sex among the unwilling and unpaid.”

At this point I’m just kind of waiting for the stadium’s groundskeeper to be outed as a human trafficker.

Obligatory:

“So in these four years, the protests help us train ourselves so we don’t make the same mistake again.”

Wow, these kids are magnificent. I was far less mature at that age....

“Drunk Cubs fans” is repetitive.

“Amortization schedules, how the fuck do they work? And I don’t wannna hear from no economist, y’all giving my jobs to foreigners and gettin’ me pissed.”

Saddest part was a disheveled Jim Tomasula driving around in his van, collecting and re-selling the golf balls. He’s keeping the job until pre-season starts “ya never know”

Ah, the History Channel- where America’s racist uncles go when Fox News makes them think too much.

Stadium ruins, the country clubs of the gig workforce.

Well, the good news is he’ll never have to worry about losing another Super Bowl.

After the coaching carousel of the past few seasons, Niners fans can rest easy in the certainty that they have a coach committed to the long haul. They know he won’t run.

This is never not true. It doesn’t even matter what the Facebook post is. It could be some random person’s dinner picture, and there would be a comment saying, “teh sauce on ur spaghetti looks like the blood of Obummer’s aborted fetuses librul murderer”

Hey Burke, why isn’t this filed under Florida Man?