you’d think he’d be doing the monty burns finger twiddle at this point

Even worse, he could sack a quarterback playing for the Jets.

ghosts

We found love in a ropeless place.

Counter-point: the Padres swept the Cubs, the reigning World Series champs, and thus are now the new champions! Hurray!

It’s unconfirmed at this time whether Cowboys scouts will be in attendance.

This pic looks like the greatest Coke ad EVER.

[witty golf reference that undercuts the fact that we’re watching a guy freefall into opiate addiction]

The documents published by the Post listed “soloxex,” “vicodin,” “torix” and “viox,”

“Lucy! Lucy, get in here!”

When asked about team unity, Pete Carroll said, “United? That’s a lie.”

Man duels can’t melt real teams!

Then change the photo. I’d have sex with Kate Beckinsale under almost any circumstance I can think of, and many that I have not.

I worked on an automated twitter promotion once for a large skin care brand. We had a 90 minute meeting once called “how will people try to screw with us.”

Holy shit, do you think Lay’s is aware of that? That could be a pretty big lawsuit!!

Goddamn modern world, expecting you to read 15 words into an article and shit. Fuck that.

“elite CrossFit athlete”

It’s hard to kick ass at life when you’re living in your mom’s basement. Oh... I misread his last name as Commenter.

“Never heard of him.” - Self-proclaimed “12"