Some guy was yelling at me on Facebook last week because I have a daughter and “how can I be ok with dudes in the bathroom with her?!” I told him I was more concerned about my 15-year-old stepson who is mildly autistic being assaulted by a man in the men’s room. You have never seen such rapid backpedaling.

That’s more or less what the employee restrooms at my job look like.

They’re basically saying “Us. Men. We are the problem.” And I’m like “Yeah that’s not helping your cause, bro.”

I mean, this guy didn’t even bother going into the bathroom. He started harassing a woman in the middle of the damn store. Why bother sneaking into the bathroom!

That’s seriously the argument I’ve seen used. “Well you won’t be allowed to complain about the creepy guy in the bathroom.” Uh, yeah I will, if he’s grabbing my ass. I mean, in college one time I saw a chick passed out across 3 bathroom stalls because she’d been huffing on the toilet. That was still illegal, even…

Right how about we test some of those eleventy-million rape kits just sitting around, then maybe we can worry about your dude-bathroom-panic.

I’m not even watching, and I only read 3 books, and I was sure he wasn’t dead. But I’m still wondering where Lady Stoneheart is. She hasn’t shown up yet, has she?

Apparently Emma Watson’s gown is made from recycled plastic bottles, which is rather a nice but very subtle way to do the theme.

that is an impressive display of ass over teakettle there.

will.i.am

Like the jacket, hate everything else.

I could go for it with more eyeliner and literally any other lipstick.

I ordered a set from this company on Amazon, since it’s cheap enough that if they don’t fit it’s not a big deal. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=sr_ex_n_…

Yeah I’m planning on a few of these for the summer. They’ll fit better under my Sportbrella than an actual chair, I think.

Yeah I’m planning on a few of these for the summer. They’ll fit better under my Sportbrella than an actual chair, I…

Salad spinners: also apparently the best way to wash & dry your bras. (I haven’t tried it myself, but have heard other women swear by it.)

Salad spinners: also apparently the best way to wash & dry your bras. (I haven’t tried it myself, but have heard…

For some reason I can find a vast variety of swim SKIRTS all of a sudden. But the skirts are weird and I don’t like them. Shorts aren’t that different!

I’ve always been able to go to sleep and stay asleep with no problem, and wake up exactly when I want to without an alarm. Until the last few years. So I buy your theory.

Me tooo ... if it comes in not-beige. Michelle can wear beige, I am pasty white and should not wear beige.

No injuries today! I did almost collide with someone and I fell over when I let go of my ribbon to dodge him. That’s fine, I was out of breath anyway. Also a huge mosquito dive-bombed our pre-maypole ritual and we ended up all laughing to hard and swatting at it to finish.

We’re going to our friends’ house in about 20 minutes for their 22nd annual Beltane party. I will drink pretty much everything: prosecco, mead, beer, idk. Then we will drunkenly run around a Maypole clotheslining each other with the ribbons.