The Duke LaCrosse rape scandal has since proven to be a hoax. Welcome to 2007.

Ummmmm... no.

Who died during plastic surgery in a house fire.

Please.

Whatever, Nancy.

“Purple Trainwreck”.

If I didn’t live in a swing state I’dbe writing in Uncle Joe.

After Ivana went to work and showed that she was better at real estate development than he was Donald became disgusted by her.

Salma Hayek is a spinner?

Who the fuck uses someone else’s soap without permission? That’s worthy of a beating.

Your theories are idiotic.

Why don’t you just kill yourself?

No.

I had to laugh at “but ma Vanquish is the same price as a hotdog and a 12 ounce Coke!”

You take that back!

Hitler liked carob.

I want to give you a wedgie for your warning.

Carob?

“The one whose...”

Those are awesome.