To be fair, you chose the right brand.

Breathless, Manic dashed into the store, stopping mid-stride in front of the first employee they could find, skidding to a halt.

“Cake or Death” wins. Shut it down, we can all go home people. 

This just made me realize how badly I want one of those capsule backpacks for my cat. I mean, he probably won’t let me put him in it, but still.

Irony!

One of the most underrated condiments. Superb with beef and even better if you make your own with the grated root.

I don’t get this idea that a 30 hour experience isn’t worth $60 when people regularly spend $20 on a 2 hour movie.

This sounds like a one of a kind way to spend a holiday. Eating crappy food can be more fun than eating good food at times. Also who is going to Barnes and Noble on Black Friday?

At least you had the foresight to buy food in advance. One Christmas, my brother and I waited until Christmas day to go buy food. We assumed that at least Chinese restaurants would be open. Nope.

This sounds very good but it's missing a key ingredient for me: rye bagel chips. Or am I just thinking of Gardettos?

You aren’t kidding. Tacos might be the worse road food there is, except maybe soup.

Y’all ain’t nothin’

“Humanitarian aid is not always a crime”

I think ‘worked at’ is the operative phrase here. My dark little mind immediately thought about what McD’s corporate and/or the franchise owner would say about that. I’m sure they love this sort of publicity and would play it up and all that, but I could see people actually getting shitcanned quitely for doing…

I can only assume you store them next to the severed heads of your victims as this is clearly serial killer behavior.

Counterpoint: turkey is great when actually cooked correctly, stuffing is literally the best food on the planet and the most exciting thing about the entire holiday, mashed potatoes are objectively good and the whole mess tastes incredible when you pour a bunch of gravy and tart cranberry sauce on it.

1. Corn nuts are invited everywhere, at all times.

FUCK that. I’m not wasting good meat on these philistines.

A resounding 68% said they hated Thanksgiving food but ate it anyway because tradition.