With that much space for a keyboard they could have at least included the Numeric Keypad to the right.

It's about time, it's about space,

"Honey! C'mon over here, Sugarbuns! This machine just called me an asshole!"

Many of my electronics are covered with months of dust.

"Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You're my only hope."

They're justified and they're ancient, and they like to roam the land.

Engineer Scott: I found this in the ganner room ... ganner ...

Walter asked if the items on the hospital tray were Limoncello ... the Italian lemon liqueur, not lemon jello shots.

"Nobody gets between me and my Dr Quest"

A doubleshot of Calvados on the left, a doubleshot of espresso (with two cubes of sugar) on the right, and a pain au chocolat in the middle: my personal spin on a French truckdriver's breakfast. A burning Gitanes in the ashtray is optional. C'est magnifique!

Meanwhile, over in Bozeman (home of 'Moo U, the Udder University' ... the state's land-grant college and my alma mater):

Breeze, Tripp, such cleverness and a real moneymaker. You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind falls.

Why does the Gadsen, Alabama police department have two drones? For the same reason some men drive Jaguars or Hummers: penis substitute.

IHOP is for pancakes. Hot buttermilk pancakes, slathered in butter and dipped in maple syrup. With a couple of eggs, sunny side up. And hash browns. And a couple of sausage links. And a glass of milk.

That sounds like a terrific plot for a novel. Oh wait, Margaret Atwood all ready wrote one: A Handmaid's Tale.

James May, of Top Gear fame, made a house of Legos.

When the Town Crier exclaims, "Hear Ye, Hear Ye!" he's actually shouting "Hear The, Hear The"? No wonder the crowd responds, "Hear Ye, Wot?".

Liquid Wood is what a guy experiences when he's just woken up and finds himself half asleep standing in front of the toilet for what seems forever.