I fucking love cocaine!

I can't even remember how I got my pills in the stone age of 1978-82 when I lived in Badin Hall on South Quad (for sure there were no abortion crosses back then). I had to have gotten my script filled on campus, though, because I didn't have a car, and I don't think I was bringing a four month supply from home at the…

I'm surprised there aren't a bunch of private practioner's a block away from campus specifically to take advantage of that kind of fuckery and offer students a local alternative.

The health center in general had a track record of being sort of terrible before they moved it up to its new home by the laundry building. It, at least, has gotten better.

Let those who worship evil's might beware the power of Ford Fiesta's headlight!!!

And why is there no Mario Kart movie yet?

At first I was like; damn I wish I lived anywhere near NY to go to this thing. Every time I saw a post about it, I was like F***. But now, after seeing the panel, I realized I'm not worthy to be in their presence anyways, so it's all good now.

(I'd probably be the creepy guy dropping to the ground, praising Kazunori…

I had to think about this one. Being that this contest is for the Jalopnik film festival and considering that my personal favorite movie car is the Delorean DMC-12... I felt the most fitting way to go about entering was to turn that car into its own circuit.

...and with those words our hero found himself madly in love with an amazing woman with scarlet locks and a razor-sharp wit.

How about this!?

This just looks impossible. Also, I'm not eligible to win.

You guys always know how to FUBAR my productivity...LOL

Bravo Jalopnik. Brav-fucking-O.

AWWWW YEAH!!!!

Shit. You mean I have to show up? How will I talk to people without Kinja?

Dear Travis,