She’s scraping out the seed tears before they reproduce and embarrass her greatly in public, always a classy move. Didn’t you finishing school, Visigoth?

Edited because, why bother.

I think it’s more likely he’s trying to convince all of us that the orange, tiny fingered Deathstar that appeared in the heavens last spring is just a kindly, non-werewolf inspiring moon.

Who would have thought a grown man named Doocy would be such an asshole?

I’m beginning to suspect she may be one of those poorly educated people Donald Trump is so fond of.

Clearly America hasn’t been paying close enough attention to our frozen provinces. Ignore the scurrilous activities inside the fridge at your own peril.

There’s a serious dearth of safe spaces.

Or the trail a bedbug leaves crawling through flour.

Frankly stories like this make me want to do a whole lot more breaking.

They realized brown guys could buy guns too? Kind of like when the Black Panthers started buying guns Reagan had a change of heart, giving us the Mulford Act?

Judging by his picture he will soon have Trump’s curious hairdo too. And by hairdo I mean gone and replaced with an animal.

Being batshit insane helps. Having the mental acuity to see the fanged menace lurking beneath the skin of anyone who isn’t white, heterosexual, male or Christian is a prerequisite. Being dumb coats it all in sugar and helps it go down.

I used to enjoy trolling at fox nation and received my fair share. I went so far as to offer to meet them at Barcelona’s airport but none of the teabaggers took me up on it.

Sick apes fuck up balmy planet with oceanfront views, start looking for a new one.

Agreed. Though I’m starting to suspect exploitation of the vulnerable for crotch gratification may be as universal as the law of entropy.

I’ve had guns drawn on me as a university student by American police, in my own driveway no less. This was for daring to reach into my jacket pocket for the passport Connecticut police were demanding. Full disclosure, I‘m brown skinned*.

That beatific smirk is an involuntary reaction to Jesus standing behind you and placing his hands on your shoulders.

Ah yes, Tantalus pricing.

Translated into mature human adult: “Keep your hands off the women who by all rights belong to me.”

Spain has the confused township of Llivia merrily Catalaning away inside France. We’re Americans. We invented tartar sauce and sent astronauts to Pluto. Surely we can pull it off too.