The only fucking disability this clown has is crime-tourettes.

I shop at Whole Foods.
I buy organic everything.
I buy in bulk.

This is the worst take of the week.

The biggest fight my kids have ever gotten into was over which hogwarts house our 3 dogs would belong in.

Are you saying you black out three times a week?

i occasionally pull up this clip to watch/listen to just because of how awesome the prince solo was. never gets old.

Counterpoint: All Starburst flavors are garbage.

Dear Sisters,

Not long ago, while traveling through the wilds of western Norway, I encountered some otherwise friendly villagers who swore up and down that Manfred Mann wrote “Blinded by the Light.” It was one of their favorite songs. Hadn’t even heard the Springsteen “version.” Fortunately, Google had been invented by that time,…

“Wedge salad”?

She looks like a sexbot with a football stuffed up her jumper.

She always dresses like an alien that is trying to fit in.

Good for you, Aimee. Like you when I was alone (non-stop for the first 30 years of my life) I shrugged and said “it’s just me, it’s just who I am, to be alone.” I tried to convince everyone around me that it was fine, it didn’t matter, I’d be alone forever and that was a-ok.

I have such mixed feelings about Pete Souza’ work. On the one hand, these are beautiful, iconic images. On the other the hand, it’s impossibly painful to see them at this exact time. I’m trying to look on the good side, but it’s just painful.

While I read the headline with zero surprise, I realize I’ve made a mental and emotional shift on Trump statements and revelations, perhaps out of self preservation. It goes something like this: as recently as a week ago, I’ve been suffocating under the weight of Trump news. We are inundated with multiple daily, if…

We’ve discussed this to death over the last several weeks. If you don’t get it by now, you never will.

get many of their ideas into Bill!”

If you look closely at the clip, Megyn is whispering something in Bobby’s ear when she hugs him. I slowed the footage down and read her lips. She said “fucking stop the fucking column or I’ll fucking kill your immediate family.”

This is probably the most satisfying conclusion to a column.

Today on 500 Days of Kristin: what is going on with her boobs in that dress? It is like they are mad at one another.