Rule of thumb - unless the server spills coffee on everyone and calls you names, YOU TIP - THAT’S HOW AMERICA WORKS.

(PS - what are GOP lunatics doing in ungodly Hooters in the first place?)

No, he thought the ancient Egyptians built the pyramids to store grain in. I can’t decide if that’s better or worse than what you thought he said.

“If you can convince the lowest white man that he’s better than the best colored man, he won’t notice you’re picking his pocket. Hell, give him somebody to look down on, and he’ll even empty his pockets for you.”

it’s obvious why he’s doing this:

And on a Hooters-like tab, the difference between 15% and 25% may only be a couple of dollars; it’s barely noticeable to me, but I’ve always thought it carried greater weight than that to the server.

Also, because I am automatically taxed on tips even if I don’t get them, I just payed to wait on you! Can’t wait to see you at church!

I’ve gotten those more than once. Strangely by making my day worse they did not enticed to explore their religion.

More like a theme restaurant with waitresses in sexy clothes (I guess...they have to wear these really thick shiny tights under their shiny orange shorts...). Anyway. The theme is generally “Our waitresses have big breasts”, but it’s actually weirdly kind of wholesome for a place that asks you to come in to ogle a…

Personally I think you should tip even if service isn’t that great. Unless the waitstaff is rude it’s best to give something.

Seems apt in this instance.

Stiff.

You know, it makes a lot more sense if Cruz and Lee are actually Kang and Kodos.

I saw a documentary about margarine production (I have weird hobbies ok) and fresh margarine also has these little waves on top when it’s filled into containers.

Lest we forget, Mike Lee is the inhuman scumbag who’s singlehandedly holding federal aid for Flint hostage.

I completely understand your fuzzy feelings toward this gif. For me, it makes me simultaneously schadenfreude-y and queasy/uncomfortable because I feel SO bad for his daughter. Not sure which one I feel more.

Yeah, I love that “FWIW” tag at the end.

ughhh my eyes

remember: we’re judging from our own lazy-asshole point of view, not from that of someone who actually wants to be an starting QB or whatever.