“He has not been a person to do staged events for the sake of doing staged events.”

That confident stride, the purposeful expression, the adoring children...my ovaries/heart can’t handle any of it.

I wish we could have them forever, but I am deeply grateful that we had them for 8 years.

LePage gets into fights with Stephen King. I’m Team King so fuck LePage.

I can barely bring myself to take a half-dead mouse out of my cat’s mouth. I’m pretty sure I would need to be sedated if this happened to me.

I’m not worried, I got myself top-notch protection.

“Schneider was nominated for a 2000 Razzie Award for Worst Supporting Actor, but lost to Jar-Jar Binks.”—Roger Ebert

If you lack the strength and dexterity to cut through an avocado skin, I seriously doubt you’re going to be able to open this packaging.

well, yeah. doesn’t everybody?

Do you want a giant alien gateway to the uncanny space behind space to drag itself from the ruined surface of Venus? ‘Cause this is how you get a giant alien gateway to the uncanny space behind space.

There’s a documentary on his relationship with that cousin and it is absolutely fucking terrifying.

After I explained the whole golden showers thing to my 87 yr old boss, who has been comparing him to Hitler for a year, that was the first thing he said - that there was a very similar story about Hitler and a very young female cousin of his who lived with him under suspicious circumstances and eventually killed…

grounds for impeachment

I’m finally, irreversibly convinced this Twitter bullshit isn’t going to change when he takes office.

When Donald says that the press reporting bad things about him is “like Nazi Germany”, he appears to be casting himself as Hitler. Hero of the people, slandered by dishonest press and elites? Yep, Donald’s calling himself Hitler now.

Someone in another thread tried to come for Lewis talkin bout his district needs work. If Breitbart dont get up out my mentions.....

I don’t see him as a legitimate President either. Thank you Rep. Lewis for your continued bravery.

i’m trying to buy a house right now.

Seriously at this point how the fuck is this real life. It’s too much to absorb. Like my new reality has shifted too quickly and I can’t fucking handle it. If I had the money I seriously would just go and herd cows at this point. The world has gone fucking mad.

Married person here! I have been told that I need to go on the pill before undergoing a medical treatment. It would make it easier to access my Fallopian tubes.