majesticseaflapflap
MajesticSeaFlapFlap
majesticseaflapflap

How many people do yo think are on medication for anxiety and depression? It feels like everyone. Does that make anyone else sad?

Done being attractive, done using make up, done brushing my hair, done brushing my teeth, is that how it works now??

In 1989, my godmother was taking a shower, when she looked up and saw a huntsman spider roughly the size of a dinner plate right above her head. She thought, ‘no worries, I will just calmly and quietly finish up this shower before he has a chance to move.’ Right at that moment, the Newcastle earthquake stuck, rattling

Must be Tuesday

Daddy’s little fraud, she’s as fake as daddy’s ridiculous make-believe bio is. She is not a “businesswoman”, her daddy gave her a “company” to play with. She was never a “model”, her daddy pulled strings to help her pretend she was. She is not “poised” or “moderate”, she is actually contrived and artificial, nothing

I can’t. I can’t make jokes about this, or find it funny, or think “oh jeez THIS guy” or any of that fucking bullshit. Because at the end of the motherfucking day, I am raising my daughter in a world that is REGRESSING instead of PROGRESSING in terms of women’s rights and that makes me fucking sick to my stomach. It

Police: “Freeze!”

I’d like to think “oh he did this because he’s stupid” but honestly I think he did this because 1: they’re fucking untouchable at this point and 2: his supporters don’t give a shit, they see nothing wrong with it. When Trump said that he could fucking shoot people and not lose any supporters, he meant it. Strap in,

Today I felt like I breathed fresh air for the first time in nine months. My heart is soaring. I’m gonna get so blackout drunk when these fuckers are finally all indicted, it will probably put me in the hospital.

My mom worked in higher education around the time that Mr. Smuttins and I were in grad school. It lead to MomSmuttins trying to drop the knowledge on us at bars, only to later ask, “Besides iced tea, what are the other ingredients in a Long Island Iced Tea?” We were 💀💀 from 🤣😂 and then had to drive MomSmuttins 🚗

“I am not shocked that part of her health was affected by drugs,” he continued. “If you want to know what killed her, it’s all of it.”

The “deep state spear” is Newt’s biggest fear and the terror that keeps him up at night: A big ol’ gay liberal dong that thrusts deep into the ‘Murican dream and pumps it full of rainbows and compassion. Oh! And the dong is black, and thinks that women should be allowed to vote.

I know people wil say I’m exaggerating, but it’s my firm belief that it’s this kind of thing that lay the grounds for normalizing victim-blaming in rape.

High school me would just have just said fuck it and chucked the bra. If you thought the straps were distracting wait until you see these G’s sway.

Ha ha! Back to the dead tree, racist Keebler elf!

I came here and didn’t see color.

Even if that is true? NOT OKAY TO SAY TO CHILDREN. For all I care, this student could have set off 12 stink bombs in the teacher’s lounge, still NOT OKAY.

Not okay in the teachers’ lounge. Not okay in private. These are the people whose job is teaching and inspiring. Labeling kids “most likely to be homeless” let alone a terrorist speaks volumes about how they really feel about their students.

“According to the Post, the seventh grader has been in the school’s honors program for two years and has never been a discipline problem.” Yeah, she sounds like a real prankster and totally worthy of being called a future terrorist.

Gotta disagree here. This was pretty shitty to give something like that to a kid. I remember being a kid and having an adult joke to me about something but I didn’t get it because they’re an adult and I took almost everything they said seriously. They had to explain it was a joke. I know the teachers were laughing as