This would be an ideal time for a “Leslie Knope Headlines” return.

Well... damn... Where am I supposed to go now? I stuck it out around here a long time, but this does not sound like something I want to be a part of anymore.

Lou Malnati’s deep dish is delicious. I just wanted to make sure that was established here.

A valiant effort, Sir Dinklage.

Biggest laugh of the season for me, so far. 

Perhaps a parlay could clear all of this up...

You see Johnny... When a man and a woman and a soup love each other very much...

I think I saw that one online recently. Only what they were covered in was not chili.

Jeez, the polar icecaps are melting and you’re over here talking about sandwiches! C’mon!

Boy, what a time to be alive. Lubricant?

duplicate

I think that’s a silly comparison, but I understand the idea that different people like different things. I just can’t wrap my head around a competition with no winner, and no expectation of a winner. It just sounds broken to me.

Are the matches held as separate events each day? I guess what I’m implying is that the event you are watching that day will end in a tie. I find that to be ridiculous. But to each their own, I guess.

Fair enough

Ok. But that doesn’t account for people supposedly choosing to watch a competitive event that is guaranteed to end in a tie. What are they getting out of it?

You could try swallowing some of the opponents game pieces. I bet nobody has thought of that one!

You start the next round by putting the whole board on the chess equivalent of 2nd base.

This sounds like the opposite of fun. What a tedious bunch of nonsense.

Maybe for the Super Bowl!

What’s crazy is that I was already picturing that. Convenient!