It kind of looks like she’s got bike shorts on underneath.

Relevant.

My former BF’s family had a secret like that. Except his mom didn’t know it was a secret, and said something offhand about it to the subject (I think possibly at a funeral!). Apparently it was huge drama for a couple of years.

Now I want a llama funeral.

There’s a war on tacos? Why is there a war on tacos? Who isn’t pro-taco?

So, this whole scandal really makes me want to watch the Jared Fogle episode of South Park again. I feel like it adds an essential overtext.

I assume you’re aware of this...

John Oliver as Mr. Rogers.

Now that everyone is piling on you, I realize that my post kind of sounds like I was, too. I really didn’t mean to—the unfunded PhD used to be far more rare, I think, at least in my field (and it might still be more rare in STEM fields), and I could imagine someone who graduated 10 or 15 years ago being shocked at the…

You mean because PhD programs are funded? It’s been a while since you got yours, hasn’t it?

It was a problem because unlike full-line Nordstrom, the Rack actually does have corporate-set restrictions on returns, since everything is already discounted. Cashiers are expected to enforce those policies, until a manager shows up and makes them look like an idiot by just doing whatever the customer wants (at which…

Do they then make sad noises about how they aren’t making their sales days? “We’re down from last year!” “Well, yes, because a guy tried to return a pair of worn-out, stinky, $200 shoes without even a receipt, but he yelled so you gave him the money.”

If I worked as a server I would love to carry around a hatchet, just so I could take it out everytime someone said anything about “menu hacks” and say, “I got your menu hack right here, asshole.”

I want to say, “Technically, if he never pays for anything, he’s not a customer,” but when I worked customer service at Nordstrom Rack the managers were such doormats that they’d literally hand cash to obvious and repeat scammers in the name of “good customer service.”

Standalone locations are corporate. The ones inside other stores, and sometimes inside malls, are usually licensed to that store (which is why getting your Starbucks at Barnes and Noble is more expensive than just going across the street to the standalone Starbucks). They don’t have a franchise model that I know of.

Was the lesson “now you don’t have any weed” or “now you have to watch your mom be high”? Because once when I was in high school my mom (who normally didn’t drink much while I was growing up) got trashed at a wedding and it was the worst.

Weddings aren’t big fun parties, though, especially for the people getting married. Everyone squeezes themselves into vaguely uncomfortable clothes and spends the rest of the evening trying not to spill anything on them while being served halfway decent food that cost twice as much as it’s worth. The dancing part is…

My cat got into the refrigerator by himself somehow. Luckily my mom felt snacky, because it was late at night when she opened the door and he sauntered out. No one knows how long he’d been in there for.

Putting makeup on your baby isn’t awful. It’s the only comfort of bored moms of larval-stage infants everywhere. They’re going to draw all over their own faces with Sharpies in a year, anyway.

Genealogical intrigue is the best. I discovered recently that my great grandfather had a first wife that nobody in my family had ever heard of.