Barry Bostwick is going to play Santa Claus in forthcoming comedy Santa Girl haha I love it.

I give you Alison, the best person ever!

Perhaps her future husband can persuade her to move to the US?

Her laugh is giving me what I need to get through this day.

Why is it that a white woman only has to bleach her hair to be considered attractive by other white people? It’s like no one even looks at their faces to consider their features. This photograph is a good example of that. Throughout junior high, highschool, and university me and my brown friends wondered about this.

I wisely neglect to comment on #PaulaDeen but I say my husband is disgusted with her.

Idris as a male escort in Absolutely Fabulous (19:40):

I’ve only seen a handful of movies that Idris Elba has been in, but I think I need to change that very quickly. That voice, holy cow.

I have had a lady boner for him since I was a wee teen and he was a drug dealer in Go. Such a babe.

Also Ryan Seacrest is not hot. He’s attractive in the sense that his face is symmetrical, but he is not hot. I don’t want to imagine Seacrest fucking me or anyone. He is a human Kermit the Frog. I want Seacrest to sell me toothpaste.

Pepto Abysmal.

As it turns out, several analysts have pointed out that Kimmel actually got the health care bill pretty right, even better than the people who wrote the bill. So, here we are. The former host of the Man Show knows health care policy better than the people who are responsible for writing health care policy. Is Adam…

She also has no idea what words like ‘otherwise’ mean

In case you missed it, the president gave a speech today at the UN wherein he promised to “totally destroy” North Korea if Kim Jong Un, whom he referred to as “Rocket Man”

Take it away, Hulk:

I can’t comprehend how he was allowed to stand up in front of the UN and say he wants to destroy an entire country. No one has ever done that because it’s insane and basically the evilest thing anyone could think of doing.

So first the President of the United States calls the leader of nuclear armed North Korea on twitter a name so childish that it would get you laughed at and called a dork at any middle school playground if you used it.

Also, this comes from someone currently inside the UN building: it’s rude and disrespectful to go past the 15 minutes each country is allotted to speak for (he went for 43 minutes, FYI). Also, rumour has it that no famous people wanted to show their faces at the UN because of him. Except Giselle Bundchen today, so…

We are all General Kelly.