How in the world do you get multiple dead Volkswagens into a drive-thru sauce tray?

Or maybe someone who has.

Obligatory:

Poor Atlanta fans, can’t find a Flames broadcast anywhere.

I don’t know why, but suddenly I have a craving for mor chikin.

Chicagoans are quick to point out that everything south of I-80 might as well be Indiana, so a big chunk of Illinois probably ought to be blue.

They’re waiting to find out the final Calder Trophy vote before making up their minds.

Freakin’ Jon Casey.

+3 pork steaks

General Manager Mike Keenan made some really good trades. Like the time he traded a bucket of chipped pucks and used duct tape for Wayne Gretzky.

The only thing the Lightning are striking these days are golf balls.

Not-John Goodman’s twin brother 

Silly galaxy brains.  Brown skin can’t melt steel beams!

So... Steep learning curve is steep?

When I opened an Epic account to download Fortnite, I gave them personal details that were, well, a bit creative. I just don’t see myself giving them a tangible link to my real name and address and credit.

1060 West Addison, Chicago, Illinois.

How’s the learning curve?

I haven’t seen a Sharks playoff goal with a more obvious hand involved since Marc Bergevin in 2000.

A goose would have honked.

Sorry, it’s either a two-minute minor or a match penalty. No major penalty available for targeting the other guy’s grill.