Marry Simmons, fuck Stephen A., kill Rovell

There’s video, but this is all I need:

the sound the grape lady makes after she falls is forever burned into my brain.

excuse me, sir EXCUSE ME, have you heard about [school i attended or am a fan of]?

Northwestern has its moments.

What I really enjoy about that question is that it’s basically a “talk about” prompt, but phrased as a question.

“LeBron, is this a case of where you have to defend home court at this point?”

According to Berhe, Wright paid the $632.08 fare and a $300 tip. Maybe just rent a car next time?

I would agree to this if MLB also agreed to outlaw the Boston accent...and Red Sox fans...and the entire franchise.

Neighbors.

ghosts

“Mr. Snyder, this is Tony. I think I have an idea. Yes sir, it will save millions.”

In surprising reversal, Chad Johnson is taking the House to it.

“You know what I like.”

Both Ryan brothers are married.

Most teams are too risk-averse to put up with any potential for “controversy” for a player who won’t see the field unless things go very wrong. (And Seattle, where an entire half of the team doesn’t seem to like its starter very much, is maybe the last place that can handle a QB controversy.) 

This is just another empty gesture ESPN is using to prove they’re not too Liberal. Well, if they ever want to win ME back, they’re gonna hafta:

But are you really ready for some football?