wow—I thought my k-9 gym teacher had retired, but this sounds just like him. Dude used to out kids in trash cans and sit on the lid, encourage students to hit other students, and on field trips wouldn't feed the soccer team because "only pussies play soccer." He also married (and divorced) three kindergarten teachers…

libraries give us books for free, so money doesn't need to be part of it. I listen to a lot of books too.

That is awesome. Totally, totally, awesome.

If your granny is in hell (doubtful), she's with aaaaaaaaaal the awesome people, and I hope to meet her when I die.

Sandwich making skills are worrisomely left out.

Do you mean "wattle" or was she supposed to animate it?

I'm tempted to make mine a SHIRT OUT OF NAPKINS and say that one she can wipe goob on.

Cyclops like the one-eyed things, or the X-man? Either way, I get it.

Too bad it wasn't twins—you could have "Absalom Absalom"

Those sounds! They just got even cuter!!!

From your comment, maybe not being very careful with spelling ?

all the stars!!!!

But The Smiths taught me meat *is* murder.

Just everyone's favorite sexual predator...

Really amazing article and fascinating graphics with it. Thank you!

I'm feeling worse for Job than usual.

+1,000,000 for "The Aristocrats"

Sounds like someone is kind of hoping that he gets "forced" into having to have some dude-on-dude encounters....

Faith in world rising!!!!!

I once revealed this as the lie parents tell when they put down a dog to my high schoolers, and one said "Oh, that's funny, because my parents *really did* send our dog to a farm!"