Still a chick car, but it looks like fun.

What’s the over/under on months until Doug sells a Viper to Tavarish?

I’m glad to hear you don’t care what other people think. But then again, they are stupid for not thinking the same way you do.

Judge other people much?

I’m not worried. I finance my Kia for 98 months, but they were nice enough to give me a five month delay on payments. It’s like I’m driving for free!

Halfway readable? Somebody is fishing for a Christmas bonus. Save it for your performance review.

This is what the rest of the company calls whining.

I told you not to ruffle any feathers, Clarence!

That’s what she said?

I die a little bit every time you get behind the wheel of your car

Ugh, I forgot that was an actual thing. Nice pull

Choose Dr. Pepper, not because of his degree, but because of the dedication to earn the degree. Mr. Pibb was a slacker - only got his Master’s

I’m just as impressed that JJ won the race. He needed his best restart of the season and he got it, which hasn’t been his strong suit for about three years now.

NASCAR is going to let them race, no matter what. So, why not push the envelope as much as possible? That’s what this stupid championship format encourages.

It’s going to be sad when he gets deported and his family ripped apart.

I, for one, live my life a quarter mile at a time. It’s the only way I know how to live, apart from being a cat burglar. I also, never knocked out nobody. This guy owes me a 9-second car.

I always figured Satan to be in a Super Snake peeling out of a Cars and Coffee taking out a row of grade-schoolers

Nobody is going to be surprised when his phone shows up underneath a fat roll

The Ford Fusion is going to look so awesome in 4-7 years

I like my cars like I like my women, clunky and full of straight lines