No one's ever heard the "Shania Twain has a wooden foot" conspiracy?

That's a good catch.

I'm thinking The AVClub "Most Read Articles" selector has been into the blow as well.

I couldn't not hear your entire post read in Alvy Singer's voice.

I'm glad you showed up, @unexpected_dave:disqus ! I was worried when you weren't the first comment.

What can we say about 4. George Lucas that hasn't been said before?

I guess that depends where you work.

(Moves away from perspicuous alba) "Is that guacamole?"

Strangely enough, only five points.

In his bathrobe and slippers.

Did no one else expect a chicken to run out into Tai's arms when Jeff announced "Here's MARK!"?

I'm not the pheasant plucker, I'm the pheasant plucker's son.

I'm not sure how "urban" you are, but most farms don't raise bears.

Wait, is Ariel Winter old enough for us to make these jokes now?

"Cabot? Cabot! CABOT!"

You're from BC? Which Dispensary do you frequent?

A Quinn Martin Production.

"What's a baby?"

Grounding all air traffic has only happened once before, IRL, so this sounds big.

Good evening. Here is the News for parrots. No parrots were involved in an accident on the M1 today, when a lorry carrying high octane fuel was in collision with a bollard … that is a bollard and not a parrot. A spokesman for parrots said he was glad no parrots were involved.