I can just imagine you plugging in every song but the acoustics turning it all into that chant from Eyes Wide Shut.

Even at four years old, that song flooded me with embarrassment and a need to run away. Who likes that song?!

(Puts AUX cord into phone) (Freak A Leek plays for mere moments before the AUX chord is taken away and hushed threats are heard over the microphone)

(Two glasses of champagne in, grabbing the groom's gradnfather's glasses and a rogue black blazer from off a chair) Y'all know "Once In A Lifetime"?

You know damn well I'm referencing women getting up at a mic to sing a pitchy warbling cover of "Dance" or "Still the One."

Who has the budget to rent the entire state of Pennsylvania for eight hours?

(Sings "Blue Velvet" during groom/mother dance)

Relatedly, why do brides or members of the bridal party insist on singing at weddings?

The frug? This is a wedding, not Sweet Charity.

I could see Schmidt ranting about Cotton Eye Joe being tacky.

Also a great way to look for when the catering staff is starting to break out the desserts and where they're putting them.

Do you work at Dunder Mifflin?

No song with an accompanying dance? Nuts to that, The Wobble is the best.

"We could stop cleaning the ice machines."
"Right….Start stop cleaning them…."

It's not even like they gave him some rags lying around so he could be Stayne the Peasant or whatever, they had to make a full suit of armor for him and what I assume are those guys he mentions in that passive aggressive TMI song about his hometown.

Last time a ginger male talked about an egg cream to me, I was watching MSTK's Squirm.

Drag Race and La Croix.

Group projects, Clue, drum circles….

The queens we use would not excite you.

It's better to play Apples to Apples with clever people.