Wooowwwww. Fuck tha Rockies. Fuck the motha fuckin rockies. Im so sick of this sack of shit team im bout to puke. Fuck Mansfart. Fuck the “Rooftop”. And fuck everything. Thanks Rockies.

“What sense any of this makes is beyond us, but listen for yourself:”

Are you Dominican, by any chance?..

Don’t we all kind of want Wes Welker to stop for his own health? Wes, it’s cool; we like you and you can just do Molly and go to horse races for the rest of your life.

That’s a married bear that tried to hire a gay prostitute! He’s not a good bear!

Are you sure his name is Parsnips Bazinga?

That’s badass.

Wow. Besides shitting all over the place for the past few years, Timmy has another thing in common with my dog!

Friends, my hips have become two bags of sand and I cannot urge the ball into the zone with the velocity of my dreams and the thoughtfulness of my ancestors. I have consulted the priests and they all tell me, yes, Tim, you have ghosts in your bones and your gyrations have angered them. They tell me my haunted bones…

This is a guy who spent the first five years of his career as one of the best pitchers in baseball, and the last three as one of the very worst.

Man, I can only hope there’s some sort of now-legal medication in Lincecum’s home state that can help him deal with the pain that condition will cause.

27 in 16 sentences.

Weird, saw a post earlier where Alcides Escobar did a very similar play yesterday and everyone was ragging on it as some kind of everyday thing. The author even seemed to hate that SportsCenter wasted time on showing him “throw the dick off the ball.” Weird how that works out.

I guess we’re just going to ignore the pitch in the upper left, right? If an ump is going to call the upper left a strike, he can’t call the lower right a strike. Batters can’t easily cover that wide of a zone.

The red dot to the left, well out of the strike zone? That was his issue.

+1. Came here to see if it had been said. Nice work.

I thought he’d be used to a hotbox by now