So can anyone just board that bad boy and stake claim to it? I’d love the spend the rest of my days living in a fucking mermaid house in the open ocean. I bet I could collect enough rainwater and capture enough seafood to live on, then I’d just, I don’t know...lay around taking naps and masturbating in my mermaid…

This is one of the less awful but still pretty awful aspects of his presidency. It’s not just that he’s a fuck up, it’s that he insists on being personally involved in this stuff and is embarassing the whole country in front of other leaders. Asking the President of Mexico to pretend like he might pay for the wall…

What kills me is THEY REALLY THINK THEY’RE VICTIMS. Hell, my conservative religious in-laws were super against “entitlements” until their 18 year old granddaughter got pregnant. Then, the REAL injustice was that she had to wait in line at the county benefits office...because all those “illegals” were in line in…

So to summarize, ICE is actually ruining the promising futures of young men who came to this country as children, worked hard, and thrived. Meanwhile, the DOJ is busy investigating the tragic plight of the white kids ‘discriminated’ against in college admissions. And over at the Dept of Ed, DeVos is clutching her…

One is a poorly structured horror story that nobody wants to live through in real life.

She reads notes written by 10 year olds because that is the highest level of English the Republican base can comprehend. She knows her audience.

Oh it definitely is. She reads a letter from a child praising Trump at every press conference now. How I wish I was making that up. We are in the worst timeline.

Yes, my first response to that last line was, “Gross.” Then I back peddled because I thought, “Wait, how old is Barron? Maybe Trump’s nepotism is going get him a job at the White House, too?!”

After Miller’s show concluded, Sarah Sanders read a letter from a 10-year-old boy who wrote to offer to mow the White House Lawn.

Make sure there’s a big sign that says SHE’S FAKING IT.

Cats doing drugs. What next? SMH

What are the chances that he doesn’t know the difference between England, Great Britain, and the United Kingdom? I’d say it’s a mortal lock.

Brielle sounds like a small cheese..

Thank god they had that fourth child... Those monogrammed towels in the kids’ bathroom would have been alarming.

The entire family has weird names. Kim married Kroy (yes a real? name). Kim already had Brielle and Arianna. With Kroy, she had: Kaia, Kane, Kash, and Kroy Jr.

The best part of that name (Kash) is that Kim and Kandi actually argued about it because Kandi said she wanted to name her son Kash (she was not pregnant at the time and I’m not sure if she was even dating anyone; I can’t remember), but Kim got to it first.

I wake up every morning in a house that was built by slaves, and I watch my daughters — two beautiful, intelligent, black young women — playing with their dogs on the White House lawn.” Michelle Obama, July 2016

I cannot stress this enough to Trump, he does not have to stay at the White House at all or ever darken Washington DC with his presence again. It’s simple, “I resign the presidency effective immediately,” sign and date it.

He’s going to install a guilded sculpture of parrots fucking in the Oval Office, isn’t he?