My MOH insisted on taking my phone at 5 pm the night before the wedding and gave it back after the reception. Any texts or calls that came in (and OMG there were tons apparently), she took care of so I could just drink my mimosa and hang out. It was awesome.

This bride is the ultimate in tacky and awful. I’m glad this…

I’m with you. I think the bride would have a few things going on that day. But I suppose if you were close with someone in the party, you could text them? I dunno. But LOL at sending a bill. I’d send back a Polaroid of my middle finger.

If Baker didn’t tell the couple about her last-minute absence, that is indeed uncool.

The law is the law, what you think is irrelevant. If you want to take money away from your stepkid, you’re an asshole and your stepkid knows it.

“Cinamin.” THRICE.

omg her tragic spelling of spaghettios

Joey doesn’t share food!

• “Matthew is not a compassionate individual. He is a control freak, and the more money he has, the more fucking ruthless he is.”

And yet still not actually comparable to genocide.

Okay so I’m not going to get into serious details about who I’m talking about but I just need to rant for a second.
Someone has been crashing at my apartment for a few months and DOES NOT UNDERSTAND BOUNDARIES. I have talked to her MULTIPLE times, nicely and incredibly angrily, about not TAKING MY FUCKING FOOD WITHOUT…

My heart stops beating when I get a phone call. Like, haven't I let it be known I loathe talking on the phone?

ALL OF YOU PEOPLE HERE NEED TO STOP DRIVING ON THE PHONE. please, before you T-bone someone.

How is a tossed pad in the trash any different than a tossed tampon?

Please explain how you ended up west of the SF bay?

Sucks for his former co-stars, though. They probably need the residuals.

He probably also made this sign:

Missing an A there, lads.

I fail to see where your cousin did anything wrong. HER wedding isn’t occurring to accomodate YOUR needs. It’s HER wedding. She decides. And if she wants other kids there but not yours, so? Do what you did, say no, spend the money elsewhere but don’t bitch that you’re somehow being punished because your cousin didn’t…