Honestly, at this point I would accept an OkCupid match who had 10 favorite books.

And execs should work as admins. THE COPY MACHINE IS NOT THAT DIFFICULT TO OPERATE YOU FUCKING OVERPAID SCHMUCK.

He could, in fact, get it.

HONEY PINKHAM DON'T GIVE A FUCK.

Hey you, dude with glasses and light blue shirt, call me! I like what you're working with.

Frequent reader, first time commenter. Fat guy.

Because you will find a decent person out there. I thought I was finished in my early 30s then an old friend came back into my life and we've now been married for 16 years.

This is almost as awkward as when Antz and A Bug's Life came out at the same time. Sorry, J Lo. Nicki is Disney and Iggy is Dreamworks.

Noting your burner name and general polite tone , I'll respond:

In the UK there is a brand of snack called Wotsits - which in their unflavoured form are also used as packing material.

He the most ordinary looking British man. Albeit a clever and talented one. No disrespect to our John here but men in the UK look like him all the time. You lot seriously seem to love him. I don't even pretend to understand it at all. Or that it matters just that ... you should come here. You will not be…

It's red.

Red.

ugh irish accents idk what you're saying but say it more

I'm kind of ashamed to admit that I have no idea what gravlax is and for a moment thought it was a Pokemon.

I once tried to order a drink, but instead of asking for a gin fizz, I asked for a jizz.

wine people.

Ugh, everyone knows a dry latte is a latte with only a splash of vermouth. What is she talking about?

I wouldn't mind a burger with blue cheese on it, but I have no idea how much to put on there. PLEASE, DO IT FOR ME, WHY CAN'T YOU JUST PUT ON THE RIGHT AMOUNT OF BLUE CHEESE THAT I LIKE ON MY BURGER OH GOD I DON'T KNOW HOW TO LIVE IN THIS WORLD!!