Remember, kids, always pre-heat your take to 450 degrees before seeing film.

Well played, sir or madam. Well played. “It’s just another few hours. You have any more wine we could open?”

In a two party system, that’s what the primary is for. And it worked! Bernie’s challenge to HRC drove her to the left on a number of issues. Maybe not all of the issues that you care about, or that I care about, but it had a significant effect.

Now that the primary is over, and the two main parties have picked their…

As long as they aren’t more than 200ish miles away, because if they are, you’ll be spending the night to recharge.

The Bolt’s biggest failing: No fast charge network.

#notallunservicedelevators

“Several semi-coordinated sharks” sounds a lot more ominous than one angry shark.

The best thing about this is after all that shifting the speedo still reads about 7 mph.*


*Yes, I know it seems to be broken.

I intend to use this in all future Power Point presentations. But really it feels like a closing slide, rather than an opener.

They should really call it the B-21 Stadium.

I’ve read that, too. If people are saying it, maybe there’s something to it?

Leg amputation might be even cheaper.

Did we really need an Eyes Wide Shut reboot?

How I feel about watching Ivanka break down:

I already hated that song they did with Halsey, but you know what improves it? When they say “In the back seat of your Rover/That I know you can’t afford,” imagine that they are talking about one of these:

No, no, no—the answer here is a 5 liter Mustang from the late 80s. They are still on the front edge of the “classic curve,” they’re plentiful and simple enough to fix easily, and they can still serve as a blank canvas if you want to go faster. Plus, they’re new enough that they’re at least moderately safe in an…

I mean, time bombs are pretty chill right up until they go off. Until then it’s just a nice clock, some wires, and some fun putty to play with.

I bet under similar circumstances (i.e., an urgent need) an epipen would be administered free of charge, too.

I was saying Boo-urns.

Let us know if their condition changes.

Wait, it’s not that simple, is it? Advancing sick leave isn’t the same as “paid maternity leave,” even if it’s better than nothing. Or is there something else this is referring to?