I assume we can look forward to Penn State erecting a statue in honor of Simon soon.

Rockets historically don’t perform well when confronted with a Challenger.

GW truly is something, legendary. Thirty years from now when my grandkids hear the names Curry, Thompson, Green, their eyes will go wide and they’ll say they were the greatest ever. They’ll also say Durant was a bitch.

Crushing Georgia’s hopes and dreams is old hat to the Russians.

I always love when players thank Jesus for helping them win, because Jesus gives fuck all about the Christians on the other team right?

How great would it have been if he sent it “Cash on delivery”.

Um, Barry, you got a slight error here.

If they’re so smart how come they don’t play football anymore?

“I shalieve” is something Shazier’s teammates should all say more, especially in club bathrooms

I have no doubt he’ll walk again; but there is no chance he plays football again.

Pitt the Elder!

New rule, all touchdowns must be scored by fat guys over 300 pounds.

THIS GUY JON GRUDEN, I CALL HIM DONALD TRUMP BECAUSE HE’S FALLEN UP INTO A JOB HE DOESN’T REALLY WANT AND IT’LL PROBABLY END IN DISASTER.

Did your friend’s mother have several reputable people publicly accuse her of using drugs, resulting in authorities opening an investigation, upon which your friend’s mother publicly stated she was entering rehab to deal with her problem? Then did you still refuse to form an opinion because it was more convenient to…

I see your point, but that’s not actually what the word “holiday” means. I am not Jewish, but I still think of Hanukkah as a holiday, because it is, in fact, a holiday. It may not be a holiday I personally celebrate, but it’s for sure a holiday!

ESPN’s likely reaction? Suspend Jemele Hill.

If I was Rob Manfred, I’d take away Dan Le Batard’s Hall of Fame voting privileges.

I worry about Larry King’s suspenders breaking right through his clavicles and splitting him into three sections.

Ironic shitposting is still shitposting.