Paris Hilton's bar tab tip is more than what I earn in a year. :-/

I feel like that's a bill you could stand to be a little stingy on, but nope - she tipped just slightly higher than 20%.

""Taking Back My Narrative."? Because "Here's My Spin" was too pithy? Dudes, attempt to stay in the domain of pseudo-truth-telling, without pointing out that it's all fake right in the title. These post-modern kids and their "narrative."

There is no better competitor than Ohio. SHE WAS ROBBED.

We wouldn't be in this scandal situation if they'd have given the crown to my imaginary BFF Miss Ohio:

To be somewhat fair, this was not "opening night" it was the the first preview. She still has plenty of time before opening night.

I rewatched the whole movie the other day, and dead-ass, the entire film is a metaphor for black cultural oppression in the US. And everyone kind of missed it. I think I want to write an article about it.

Dear la times

OMG sometimes i can't. Even talking about gender equality enrages people?! Not trying to take over, EQUALITY?! im done

The Republicans want this to happen. Your life bleeding out in a back alley somewhere or imprisoned is the tax they want to levy on you for being a woman and having the gall to try and control your own body. To them, everything is working out according to plan.

I was working as a cocktail waitress at a place that also served dinner, and I had a table of about a dozen people one night who were going to dine and then stay for the show. At the beginning of dinner the woman who appeared to be the coordinator waved at me and said they'd be paying with a company credit card, and…

AMAZING.

I am astounded at how spoiled people never even fathom that shit could get us broke mofos arrested.

ugh, "OUT OF TOWN" guy reminds me of a lady who tried to check in to the hotel i used to work at.

Says the guy in the $4000 suit, come on.

Ahh... Monday lunch, BCO, some vodka... life is good... now if i only had the vodka...

Instead of punching her in the face, like I wanted to, I said, "how 'bout I don't charge you for the haircut, and we'll call it even?"

Karen Milton:

My favorite part of Monday!

In my defense, I took my mother to see "How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days". Kate Hudson owes me at least $7. I'll collect the other $7 from McConnaughey.