Can we get this woman a reality show, asap? It would guaranteed be more watchable than the latest 15 variations of Celebrity Gerbil Stuffing we get foisted on us every goddam year. #soccer

@87CapriceEstate: I'd put her on the lift and rotate her tires anytime #militaryvehicles

Next time you run this feature, just be honest and call it People Covered in Vomit and Shit #failgate

This ranks up there with the leaf-blower.

The Spectrum? I thought that old heap caved in years ago. #worldseries

I am filing an amicus brief on behalf of Little Sean and all other innocent penii. #seansalisbury

The evidence will never stand up in court. #rimshot #seansalisbury

Wow Tracie, this is like one of those Sally Struthers commercials. Whenever I think a friend/relative/random person is being a douchebag, I'll remember that it could be 1000000 times worse. #bridezillakaren

St. Barts is similar, with the addition of a big hill on the inland side. #planelopnik

@london-rhino:

@theart: Do they make Rich Corinthian Whale Penis leather?

A new interpretation of "taking the package".

Wow, great exchange rate on the blowie. Can I get them shipped internationally?

Got it bad, got it bad, got it bad; I'm hot for Hannah...

@duurtlang: Golfamino - it could happen

@Ralph Wiley's In His Grip: I plan to have my ashes poured into my ex-wife's gas tank.

Sweet, but it just screams "arrest on sight".

My car, when parked in a concrete, underground garage. Otherwise, I never feel truly safe with all those whackos out there.

That's also how they did the initial glide tests back in '77.

@theart: They ought to pop up randomly, like whack-a-mole.