Hell yeah! Got him!

I’ve never understood this take -- one team that spends a bunch having a shitty year in no way invalidates the fact that spending is a major factor in championships. It’s the “We had a Black president therefore racism is over!” of shitty sports takes.

Are you positing we live in a world that is actually a sequel to Teen Wolf (but not the Jason Bateman-starring Teen Wolf, Too) and in which Baker Mayfield is good at football because he’s actually a werewolf? If so, I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

I’d though I’d seen every incarnation of bros doing stupid bro shit to drink a beer, but never have I seen someone start a shotgun by using their teeth. Holy shit.

“Pretty much every terrorism expert I have talked to”

Sigh...you just don’t understand football, Joseph Finn

because President Obama (kind of but not really) also “did that thing” that we hate Trump for.

“Stay away from Barack Obama,” advised Steve Elmendorf, a well-known Democratic lobbyist who worked on John Kerry’s 2004 presidential campaign.

Wow they worked in a restaurant and then later had children! What a great story that clearly teaches the value of food-based employment!

“The funny thing, as Sen. Dianne Feinstein pointed out, is that this bill has no chance of becoming law, given that the Democrats control the House.”

And then the NYT will forever after in every article about Trump’s racism racially-charged rhetoric point out that he condemned those chants so they have nothing to do with him.

The point of this article is fairly confusing, as the first 3/4 of it complain about the lack of moves, and then the conclusion says making moves just to make moves is a bad thing, anyway. But possibly the most confusing part is saying “the impact hitter wasn’t even on offer” when Ratto’s tagline specifically…

“It doesn’t matter if there’s contact”

Meanwhile, this field which isn’t safe enough for professional athletes is used all the time by unpaid athletes!

“A real man wouldn’t need to ask his wife for approval”

“where they visit the Vikings field”

No billionaire ever “earned” that much money

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Sister Souljah, welfare “reform,” and a certain super-racist crime bill all say hello...

“Just asking for the guy to get his day in court”