WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF BACKWARDS ASS BACKWOODS THE HILL HAVE EYES TYPE SHIT ARE THESE PEOPLE RUNNING?!?!

This is NOT ok.

My mother's dining room. So basically yes.

Yes—agreed. Everything she does has a touch of irony, doesn't it?

REMEMBER ALL THAT MATCHY SHIT THEY HAD? Like, there'd be a pair of pleated trousers, a blouse with shoulder pads, a tank/chemise, a jacket, a long coat/duster, and mid-heel pumps, all available in the same five precisely matching pastel shades : winter white, blush, powder blue, mint, and lilac.

Caftans are the shit and the truth is, if you wear a good one with confidence, NO ONE will call you out because it's impossible to argue with a good caftan.

The 70s were really just the poor man's 20s, which is why I love both decades of fashion. I'll gladly attend your caftan brunch as long as I can wear my hair wrap.

Meryl Streep in Manhattan (1979) She's so beautiful in that movie it hurts to look at her

No you're not wrong, and I agree. I side-eye women who do it as well, but I tend not to judge. It's a mere annoyance when women do it, but when men do? I tend to think there's something going on with him mentally that he NEEDS that type of attention, all day, everyday.

If you're going to give anyone a pass for reason B, you should take into account that for the vast majority of animal species, it is actually the males who do the preening and displaying for the benefit of females. So maybe even human men still have some remnant of that "primordial need."

"Thermoses" looks like the name of an Egyptian Pharaoh to me.

If you're cool with the rest of the bullet points, chances are you're looking for the sweet release of death anyway.

* We wake up and cuddle, talk, make love, be affectionate.

Where is this girl? Running for her damn life if she's got an ounce of sense.

Fuck this. I don't even make myself breakfast in the morning…wait is he against having cheezits and chez wiz for breakfast? Or jelly beans? Because both of those have been breakfast this week and it's only Tuesday.

She works "WITH HIM, not for him." Right! Bringing light into the world, and by light I mean douche chills.

P.S: candidate should be ok with possibly being murdered and buried under the floorboards.

I loathed this guy from the start, but for a while there I was wishing him the best. Like, he doesn't seem evil, no skin off my ass if he finds some equally annoying Christian hippie to be spiritual with. But I changed my mind once he started talking about looking for a muse. Fuck him, I hope he has to play out D/s…