In the venerable words of Ice Cube: check yourself, before you wreck yourself...

One might even suggest he “watch himself.”

When [Modest Mouse lead singer Isaac] Brock left the scene he backed into a cop car, but he just drove off. Sometimes life is okay.

Do they make gloves that would fit his hands, though?

Man, nothing is more intimidating than the phrase “LISTEN UP, YOU GOOFBALLS!” in pink comic sans.

According to George Costanza, we have a deal with the pigeons:

Liar. Those are schroedinger doors, until opened and proven otherwise they are both lambo doors and not lambo doors.

Investors are confused!

Really? When did you play this? When it was new? The lighthouse battle, driving through the cave, getting the buggy for the first time, commanding antlions, hanging with DOg, that early bit in the dark with the head crabs that was pictured and crossing that bridge also in pictures are all vivid memories that go beyond…

“Mr. Trump, are you playing Pokemon Go?”

An easy fix might be a prerecorded message like this:

If it’s in Sacramento (which I know it won’t be) will I get to take off from Sacramento and then land in Sacramento and then stay in a hotel by my house?

Yeah, dude. The tiny little V8 in the Alfa Romeo Montreal sounded awesome with its cross plane crank.

Slightly used...

There’s a tendency for multiplayer game communities to consider competitive the Real mode, while quick play is for scrubs.

And the Jeep transmission problem claims yet another life.

Then I’ll have SeaWorld install a park in the White House backyard, because it’s a disaster that no U.S. president has ever owned a whale. NEVER. Crazy.

Sounds like the crew’s relationship is on the rocks.