Locust Abortion Technician's saved articles

Models — professionals renowned for their thoughtfulness — singing a popular song by a popular artist. Your outrage threshold might could use some recalibrating.

do you believe their glee was borne of their love for the word or their love of a popular song, hazel? Read more

Shoplifting is a victimless crime, like punching somebody in the dark.

I’m going to hell for this:

Sounds like this movie needs more Charles Grodin and Bonnie Hunt. And maybe a St. Bernard. Throw in the kid from Step by Step and we’re really cooking with gas.

Can we get one of these task forces in Washington D.C., too - not to mention, most/all of the state capitals? I want to see Hollywood offenders stopped, of course, but I’m not convinced that politicians are any better.

Yes to everything you wrote. Exactly. Read more

For someone who makes a living killing innocent larvae, you’re A-ok in my book LAT. Rock on!

I just called my wife female, and she said, “Yes?”

Shut down Read more

You keep your cockles to yourself and out of the ficus.

That photo looks like the cover from first issue of “Obvious Rapists” quarterly.

It turns out “Canteen Boy” was based on true events.

Gotta stay in their good graces, apparently.

She didn’t marry him for his language skills. Read more

He gave his life to stop us from nuking ourselves and you don’t even have the common decency to put him on this list!

AI? In the top ten? Really? Read more

Maybe he was good at it off screen, like how Quint was good at fishing, just not in Jaws.

Sometimes a legend goes out with Street Fighter and it seems so unfortunately ill fitting. Sometimes they go out with Lucky and it’s great. Read more