Q: What do you get when you cross the imagery of "Bieber Mentor" and "Ghoulish Svengali"?

Obvious solution to beer while honoring their aversion to alcohol: Coors Qatar.

Wrong, sucka. "Downton Abbey" is fictional and doesn't exist.

Bonus question: Name the default location to drive to when given fictitious locales yelled slowly by American tourists, i.e., "Cheerio, take me to Downton Abbey, good sir!"

It's all fun and games until that guy wakes up tomorrow with an incredible itch and worm-sized creatures wriggling around under his scalp... just sayin™

I'll just leave this here, then. http://bancomicsans.com/main/

Contraire, my dear, I'll have you know everything in my house is printed in Avenir, Matrix Condensed, or if we have to, Century Gothic. It's all I can do to fight off the soul-fucking Comic Sans from creeping into their psyche...

There must be some sort of law forcing kindergarten teachers (well, all elementary school staff) to use Comic Sans in all correspondence, not only with tests, handouts, and memos, but series memos concerning being vigilant in preventing abductions and notes commemorating things like 9/11.

You can always tell the fun batshit dudes on here when they respond to a random comment in trying to rant against the article writer. #welcome

Sure: "John Mayer took an awesome stumble off the stage last week.."

Man, these questions are like the small talk in my grandparents' condo elevator. Are these guys just killing time with these useless uninteresting questions until the real reporters arrive?

I like how he reaches in his pocket to hand him the keys... if you have HD with super-sharp resolution you can barely make out lint and some melted Snickers on the keychain..

I've been told by a Belgian fellow that you can tour the Abbey every so often, and the monks make/sell an extremely limited special batch that is only sold at the Abbey during this time; they make like 150 bottles and that's it for the month or whatever, so people line up/camp out to try to get this purported badass…

..stained with the watery ring from his O'Douls...

Apparently they still sell these in Utah...

Drew — since you worked at KXAS, I have merely one question: Are Newy and Finfrock really pals?

True story — when his kid was playing high school football in Arkansas, Jerry bought a building that overlooked the stadium so he could "watch his kid practice while he was at work" or some shit. Said it on a 60 Minutes interview about ten years ago.

My friend works in IT in the stadium and she says there is an elevator that connects directly from his box essentially to the field; a fire pole would be faster, I wonder how close they were to installing one..

Maybe she should get in her fucking Gulfstream V (oh, sorry, she's not that rich), er, Cessna Citation Mustang, and jet off to an island for the week? It's not like she couldn't use an excuse to brag about that at the next luncheon she attends where all the rich ladies wear obnoxious red hats...

"This man is fourteen days out from becoming a heartbeat away from the most powerful government position in the second most populous state in America."