Your neck is on this planet, smart guy.

I’m with you. You gotta Blaze a little Nug for this series.

Look, I hate shit as much as the next person, but if Duck is going to up the ante they’d better at least get the basic facts right. You can’t be an irate pedant and also insinuate that, for instance, the Hobbit films were a continuation of Sam Gamgee’s story. You can be pretentiously superior OR righteously ignorant,…

He is a joy to watch and very likable! Even when he’s making my hometown team look terrible.

Should? No. But the more adults I meet, the less optimistic I am that they can figure out basic stuff like this.

Has anyone responded with a pithy “fuck you” yet? Asking for a friend...

I read your samples as a conversation between you and your kid, which made very little sense but was hilarious.

I have no doubt that that’s true, and I’m sure you’ve been a good and supportive dad. Being the “different boy” in the family is hard, and with social pressures in addition, that’s a lot for a young kid.

“my wife decided that he would not be circumcised, unlike our older son and myself”

As is well known, the only ways to deal with societal pressures are to give into them or to fix all of society.

I’m certainly a miserable accumulation of flaws crammed into a stained T-shirt myself

My team was the one that your team beat to move on to get thumped by the team that won this shiny trophy that is getting polished by stripper butts. My team was good and fun to watch, and so was the team that beat them, and so was the team that beat that team. All fast and fun, good times had by all.

“More and more people are transitioning to eating plant-based food at least some of the time—2017 sales grew to over $3 billion, a jump of eight percent, according to Gallup”

That’s lovely, thanks for sharing — now I’ll hear that song as an anti-Nazi anthem.

Hi, Doctor Nick!

“Three! Two! One! Iiiiiiiiit’s SOCCER TIME!”

This is the correct take. Fat cats are good cats, and this is a very good, very fat cat.

Dammit. I definitely can’t star this now, so I’ll put my +1 here.

cool. what an iconoclast you are.

Their dad is a Florida Man, so there you go.