Wow, New England, even all of the goddamn oceans are against you.

Griffin: "Can you wrap dees, too?"

Now Deadspin has a funny guy who tries to talk punting and a punting guy who tries to talk funny.

Bet they put a bounty on that third wife.

Those are eggs that are about to be hatched and sold as poultry. Nothing in that article or its sources says that they're injecting eggs meant for human consumption, nor do they say they're injecting eggs that are becoming egg laying hens.

Cazorla is playing like a man who has one of the worlds best trying to get back on the field (Ozil) and is doing everything he can to not let that happen.

Because it's Australia, technically she threw down.

The bigger shock would've been if Long actually blocked someone.

They would have just blocked each other, but neither one knew how.

Little known fact, but Andre Rison met Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes on matches.com

This is really tasteless, Barry. That man just had his home broken into.

i told u I wanna check u out make sure i like the goods

Trevor Robinson: Ugh this online dating thing is so fruststrating

Somewhat related: I'm really excited for whenever Peyton Manning retires and turns into an official offensive coordinator.

Let me start by saying I had no idea that Suns swingman Gerald Green only has nine fingers

Interviewer: Rex, what appealed to you about the Buffalo job?

I sure hope he catches the Pink Panther.

Still need two more to change the light bulb.

"I was robbed! Robbed!"

Way to go, Tom!