So, uh... at least once?

Don't you mean "ook?" (Also, good on you for remembering "ape" and not getting your arms ripped off for using the "m" word!)

Chewbacca was actually kind of tall for a wookie. I could totally get away with a slightly-shorter-than-average wookie's pelt, but then again, I'm also well over six feet tall.

Yeah, that was actually the episode where I totally gave up on Voyager. I was okay with watching it up until that point. Totally unable to watch it ever since.

And for the 83,472nd time, they've summoned Uatu as a witness. There are down sides to being omniscient in a society with a complex court system.

So, uh... I assume based on your criteria of "lax human right records" you'd be cool with other countries putting that 20% tax on America's products?

"Whorte law" is easily the most hilarious thing I've encountered in at least two weeks. Kudos!

"River Monsters," the world's most melodramatic show about fish, did an episode on these beasties. I have a painful addiction to that series, and its cheesy overstatement on the dangers of various freshwater fish.

I see what Hugh did there.

I don't have that problem with the socks, since I don't really have anything they'd go well with. I did accidentally find myself praying for the intercession of one of the California Angels, and not a heavenly manifestation once. Oh, and there was the time that I spent several hours trying to catch one of the…

Quantity != Quality. I was pretty sure the precedent on this concept had already been rather clearly established.

I had the same reaction to his questionable ability to count. The only thing that pops into my mind is that there may be 20,000 openly gay soldiers on record now? Not ruling out "Rick Perry is an idiot" but that's such a grevious error, I have to assume that's what he was talking about.

I've often raised the same point about those bumperstickers that say "There's no excuse for violence against women." They'd be much better if they just said "There's no violence."

This was pretty fun, but nobody will ever beat "The Count Censored"

Sorry Andrew, you were very close with "for a rave." The answer our judges were looking for is "clubbing."

Duh. Just walk backwards for the entire riot. I don't really see any problems with that approach.

In light of this terrible story, I too will be boycotting Lowes. Just to be safe, I'm also boycotting Home Depot, Ace, Sherwinn-Williams, Benjamin Moore and anyone else who sells paint or painting supplies. This is out of genuine support for the Muslim people of the world and not a misguided attempt to avoid…

In addition to its soothing properties, I find myself excessively interested in the strange-looking "air packet" that appears underneath the duckling. What a cool looking image!

It's actually pretty zen. When someone is on a platform and you want to life them off of it, you just remind them that there are more important things in the world than being on a platform: family, friends, a good meal, etc. Eventually, their desire to keep living their lives will gently encourage them to leave the…

I used to do the same sort of thing to my younger sister. My favorite one was when I was about 15, I got a box that would have been about the size for a VCR, put a bunch of oddly shaped items (marbles, rocks, a bunch of newspaper) inside so that it would sound crazy if she shook it. I then taped a CD I knew she…