not. enough. stars. 

this is a good Bay Area burn, much like the one you get in the stadium

“...it never happened once past the age that I could form memories”  Aaaaaaaand there’s why you don’t get it.  You’re not really forming that many memories before age 4 or 5.  And until age 4 or 5, you are puking all of the time because you have an immature digestive tract and put every germ-encrusted thing on this…

But staying apolitical is an example of a royal protocol that very much matters. Accepting the limitations of constitutional monarchy is the deal that the English royals cut centuries ago—their formal power has been steadily whittled down since the Glorious Revolution of 1688, when Parliament showed King James II the…

Yes, she technically could, and that would lead to a revolution, because as it turns out, we don’t think in 2018 that we should choose our leaders based on heredity.

Went to high school with this guy and was on the newspaper with him.  Sixteen years ago, he was always asleep in French class from watching soccer in the middle of the night.  

This is an insane take.  No good doughnut has the texture of flesh.  I ate the flesh of a cow last night.  I ate a doughnut this morning.  I am expert.

links plz? would enjoy watching that hyper-local impersonation (but have lost ability to endure entire SNL episodes on the teevee)

Clifford Puppy Days on Netflix has Henry Winkler as a pigeon.  It’s also pretty good about your good life lessons and whatnot.  But Henry Winkler as a pigeon!  

Not enough stars.  +1 Nick-at-nite.

I agree - I’d heard it described as hilarious, and I felt that I kept waiting for the shoe to drop.  I didn’t laugh much.  And I love Steve Buscemi.  I think it’s one of those scripts where you find it funnier depending on how realistic it seems to you - like how I knew lawyers/lobbyists who didn’t think Thank You for…

NOT ENUFF STARS FOR THIS

No, weird procedural ones and patent ones will come out differently.  But the newsy ones will be.

To quote Four Weddings and a Funeral: “She looks like a big meringue”

You’re blowing my mind, because all I can hear is Yanny.

Am I going mad? Are the basics of cohabitation seriously this hard for so many people?

Kids ages 6-10 are *great* at being hipsters.  “Oh, I don’t watch that show, that show is for like, babies.”  That was my hipster move with Power Rangers as a kid.  It was extra hipster because I’m pretty sure I never actually watched it and had no basis to form an opinion.  We didn’t have many channels?

This is a vindication. Not only is he convicted, but future defense teams will learn that these kind of tactics don’t work.  And, one hopes, stop doing such tactics.

This Thomas Kinkade also runs a ponzi scheme!  

This.  I have a theory that people in their early 30s are going to be society’s peak of typing skill, because AIM existed during teenage years and nobody had a smartphone yet.  You typed endlessly to your friends/crushes/randos on the internet.  Now the young’uns just iMessage/SnapFace/whatever.