I am no fan of either the Biebs or Tom Cruise, but I’m pretty sure Tom would flatten the Biebs with a quick one-two & leave him curled up on the mat in the fetal position.

Pssht come back when you’ve read the Hot Zone!

Aaaahh, yes, I forgot it’s a ‘package’ deal...

Yeah, the head-tapping starts after about 6 minutes.

And won’t it make your dick look smaller?

I second this thought! You sound like a stinky loser, dude! Also his comment about wanting a small place with a kitchen & an internet connection so he could get constant surgery?? That’s not normal, dude!! If anything you need less internet!!

Very much not on a surgical level, but I went out with a guy who had an interesting look in his (cherry-picked) pictures on one of the apps; seeing him in real-life, I realized he was wearing colored contacts. Which, just aren’t a good look. It’s like talking to someone wearing sunglasses. I couldn’t get any kind of…

ELAINE: Oh, just this woman...she got impregnated by her troglodytic half-brother, and decided to have an abortion. <Waits in suspense for what Carl's response will be.>

I think the slow burn is the way to go. Get as much of this information out there, slowly change some minds. You go in too hot, you risk riling up the other base & setting yourself up for defeat.

Well, that’s horrifying. What was the cause? Was it a clogged pore kind of thing? And how long did it take for them to go away??

Why do we do that?? I mean, I do it, too, so I’m asking for real? “You’re so cute, I could just eat you up!” “Look at those fat, juicy thighs!” “What’s cooking, that smells delicious!”??

I think her main complaint was the name... women don’t want to be compared to cows. At least this woman doesn’t. It’s really a terrible name.

What’s wrong with Ann Taylor? They have good clothes for work. Or at least, Ann Taylor Loft, does. I guess I haven’t been in a real Ann Taylor for years.

Oh God, NY & Co... Love them in my 20s, then realized what crap it was in my 30s.

The image you just painted... you should have been in charge of their rebranding!

I’ve gotten into Gentleman Jack.

Meh. Although, I did enjoy just staring at Jude Law’s beautiful heatheny face.

Ooh, really? What about it didn’t hold up? Retrograde attitudes, or just your younger self was less discerning? Asking seriously, b/c I was thinking of going back & re-reading it (it’s been 20+ years). (I also preferred Eyes of the Dragon, though)

This feels like an acid-induced fever dream.

Or that was the plan all along!