Yep. It is like the Louis CK stand up about how men are afraid women will laugh at them, women are afraid men will murder them.

Only a couple times in my life have I asked a woman who was otherwise a stranger for her number. My romantic/sexual encounters have exclusively come through meeting a friend of a friend, and something developing from there.

Hes lonely. Its been a tough time since Beth left...

I mean, it was a hyperbolic joke based on the fact that many people would be launched sideways quite drastically but not quite into space...http://www.universetoday.com/66570/what-wou…

But what does it smell like? No one seems to want to talk about that.

I wish I could be half as excited about anything.

Seriously, this is why I started sewing my own clothes. Now I have tops that properly fit my large bust and small waist, working pockets cleverly hidden in dresses, and the quality of fabrics and construction is far superior to almost anything that you would get in a store (unless you are willing to pay $500 + for…

Got married.

My first comment and I made it out of the greys. I am ridiculously pleased.

Does anything else really need to be said?

I had a roommate that was working as a pharmacy tech while going through pharmacy school. He said one day this little old middle eastern man came in and wanted to return his medicine because it hurt and was making him bleed. The pharmacist comes over and asks to see the medication an it turns out to be…

Werd. If you find a toy your cat likes, go and buy an even dozen because most will end up under the fridge.

Yup. Forget the adorably, fully-stocked antique kitchen I found at a thrift store. No, my kid is busy with a week-old balloon animal that basically looks like a large pink condom at this point.

The one thing I've learned after 4 kids is to never spend more than 20 bucks on a toy. The excitement always wears off within a month. But what do you expect with creatures who eat crayons and spend half their time trying to take their clothes off?

The poor dear, first The Cancer and now this? How will she and her mascara cope?

So what exactly happens when they can't pay their creditors?

It's almost like going on a reality show when you make a living through illegal activities is a really stupid idea.

I'm beginning to wonder if my college roommate's and my joke to get married, have an open marriage, and be bro-moms to a gaggle of adopted children is actually not a terrible idea after all. At least we already know we can live together without wanting to kill each other.

I think it's closer to #3. Most women who keep a guy waiting in the wings (at least that I've met) end up either dumped by the guy they're with or end up sleeping with the back-up guy.