The temptation to flip off the coffin and do a little dance must've been strong.

and wow his co-workers who fell for his lies and then repeated them to you AT THIS FUNERAL are shitty people.

Was it the iron-worker who was a secret libertarian

I'd be far too distracted by those buck teeth.

" Anyone who has seen even an episode of Transparent (and Stanely definitely has), or who knows the first thing about trans identity..."

Shows how much I know. I thought he was gay. He didnt need a "coming out" moment.

As long as Modern Family doesn't win anything, this night might be a success.

Tonight's surprise: Steve Carrell is getting hotter by the minute.

brutally cut from best friend posse

Gaston is totally douchey enough to be a Crossfitter. It's all just a part of the character.

It's not Photoshopped. I used to nanny for the McFerrins and am friends with their kids. It's a photo one of his kids took. Pretty brill.

I'm terrified of flying. Since I can't really change the irrational fear, I make liberal use of my Ativan and Kindle. Once we're in the air- I'm golden... The landing is a total Buzz Killington, but it beats white knuckling the entire way like I used to.

I've heard of this punishment before when a kid is totally unappreciative of other, less fun gifts. Like if you can't give grandma a sincere thank you for the sweater she knit for you, maybe you don't need the expensive gadget of the year.

I am super proud that anyone would refer to SEPTA as clean... especially given that this particular car has been doused with blood, lady juices, baby juices, and feces.

After a few rides on this merry-go-round, here's my 2 cents.

I blame Oprah for two of TV's biggest quacks and charlatans: Dr. Phil and Dr. Oz.

If you're into weird, vintage taxidermy (and really, who isn't?) I recommend reading through some of The Blogess' old blog posts. She buys vintage taxidermy, gives them names, and dresses them in jaunty hats.

I'm a former reporter and I know my ethics didn't allow me to take anything beyond free admission to events and maybe a meal.

Her feet look so very, very uncomfortable. It can't possibly be worth it.

I wouldn't be ALIVE if I followed Lisa Rinna's idea of happiness, goddamn.