But Charlie was the scent of the liberated woman of 1979, I can't hate.

Oh shit, Paloma was my mom’s signature scent. That was exotic in the era in of Giorgio of Beverly Hills. Thanks for the stroll down the perfumed lane.

Ugh, I was so pissed that post hysterectomy I still got called crazy and hysterical. Uhm, hello dumb-dumbs there is no way that my wandering uterus is giving me the woman crazies. No nothing men and their real super scientific diagnosis of gender related disorders really work my last nerve.

The ayes have it. Motion carried!

Well, now I feel like the only fair trial for these shitbags is to go full Salem witch trial; throw them in a body of water and refuse to declare innocence until they drowned.

This year I sent my dad some packets of wildflower seeds and got a three paragraph thank you. If I started posting sappy pictures and poetry he would have to spend a month in the garage working on projects to get over the shame.

The only dad poetry I find acceptable is that 3rd grade style where you write their name vertically and the use the first letters to form adjectives.

Many years ago I saw some crazy lady carrying her bichon frisée in a goddamned ergo baby carrier like it was the most natural thing in the world-SMH

So super gross, my mil has erased the term alcoholic from her vocabulary, so she just says that her abusive late-stage alcoholic husband “over drinks”. And yes he gets fully celebrated on Father’s Day, barf.

Twins, that's why. Signed bitter lady married to a similar dude

In my day dads got their #1 dad mug and a bottle of old spice and they liked it! The shit I see now on social media reminds me of weird, hormone-addled poetry I wrote about the boy I liked from home room in 7th grade.

Omfg I've read some really dark things, but that bullshit made The Road seem like a utopian fairytale

But isn't black traditionally thought to be totally inappropriate for a wedding? My grandma would be appalled to hear that this is not only acceptable, but insisted upon.

Shit! I’ve been doing it wrong. I’ve just been yelling Yahtzee right before I cum with my cheatin’ partners

I'm pretty sure it's pronounced chtullu, but I don't recommend saying it out loud

If she's central or South American, it isn't a lie. We of the US tend to forget that there are other North Americans(Canadians, Inuit) and a whole lot of people that live in the American hemisphere just south of Tijuana.

I have friends with law degrees from top ten schools who have jobs that pay $10-$15/hr and $80k in loans. And those are the ones that lucked into jobs.

Thanks for brightening my day; that building is my dream house!

Yeah, at 6’ with a lotta leg, I do not fit in coach seats. I can’t even imagine being 6’9 and trying to fly commercial.

Talk to Kate Moss about that model privilege,5’6 nothing never kept her from being successful