It’s actually a parasite, and he doesn’t even know it’s there; in addition to acting as an anticoagulant, the thing’s saliva also numbs the site where it’s inserted its barbed proboscis so the host doesn’t notice and try to dislodge it.

Eh, you can adjust to anything. I’d rather take my bus/train combo because I can read or zone out or whatever and I am a nervous driver, but it’s all relative.

I cannot be the only one here who every now and again while sitting at home relaxing suddenly has the panic thought:

I was just about to say that in all these cases they should just photoshop a man’s nipples over the woman’s nipples and call it a day.

Oh hell yes.

If we could all just buy it ourselves that would be amazing. Idk what some new owner would want to do with this place but it kind of scares me (and what if it’s that creepy billionaire guy who went after Gawker in the first place, and he just turned it into a Trump-fellating fansite or something EWWWWW).

I need at least two drinks to even think about GOING to a party.

Even if he was an affirmative action admission all it would prove is that affirmative action kicks ass and is worth the investment, because we got Barack Freaking Obama out of it.

Cooool.

Girl, get thee to Chicago. I totally get it being scary to upend your life—and at 28, you feel like you should have this all sorted by now (I’m not much older than you, so I’m with you on your late 20s being hard!)—but you owe it to yourself to go for this opportunity. He doesn’t have to move for your job, but it…

I tried to post earlier, but it didn’t make it up?

Hey Jezzies— Talk to me about online dating. Any success stories? Horror stories? Tips? Is it something worth trying?

I love that she basically told the woman to sue (as she should!): “There’s only one way that’s going to get corrected, if you know what I mean.”

YES THIS.

Also, let’s be clear here. This is a Weiner:

where have I seen this image before?

Oh, Nevermind.

I want Bernie and Killer Mike to ride off into the sunset together, touring America and having wacky adventures.

Tell her hi from Jezebel for is if you see her! Thanks.

“Donald Trump is intensely loyal. He will never let you down.” - Donald Trump’s third wife

Working class Americans for Trump