He’ll never make it, his pussy-grabbing mechanics are awful.

Dear Toronto sports fans,

Serious question. Is Toronto the Philadelphia of Canada?

Toronto fans are just bitter that Baltimore has the better hockey team. What’s that? Baltimore doesn’t have a... nope, still right.

And had barely played an out at 3B until he was called up. Then he was suddenly Brooks Robinson Jr.

Aka Casablumpkin

Joe Biden is the fucking man.

Well, let’s hope the children are OK and everyone else is dead.

West later explained he received an unexpected call, and that he had to drop the boys off at the pool.

Whoa! Good thing Jones thinks with his dick.

Fortunately you don’t get to phone a friend in a presidential debate.

I see you...and I raise you:

Fitting that a team best known for shitting itself has the team name running down its leg.

The underdog story of how a little known kid from a community college got drafted by the Dallas Cowboys.

First - it was a joke. Second - I have kids. One of them broke both bones in his wrist and was more than capable of walking; but I understand that not everyone handles pain the same way. Third - it was a joke.

Assume Notre Dame will move up 1 in the AP Poll.

+2 awkwardly bent thumbs up

The new Trump WeaveKeeperUpper™️

The squamous parasite steering him must be protruding its snorkel-like appendage for air.

When Paris tells the same story, the protagonist is named "Untamable Yeast".