My kid is 2 years, 9 months. He nurses maybe once every few days, usually when he’s had a nightmare or is otherwise freaked out in the middle of the night. It isn’t about nutrition at this point, but is about comfort. I would like for him to wrap it up soon, but don’t care enough to make a big deal about it.

Too bad! I have watched just enough Bond movies to say “generally speaking, I do not enjoy James Bond movies, so I will not spend any money on them”. However, if he were cast I would watch the shit out of them.

I suddenly feel like I’m really on top of shit. My wife and I have both spent time away from the family for work, so we are both fully capable of running the household and taking care of our son. If something happened to either one of us, our life insurance policy would pay out enough to buy a house outright in a…

When I got married I changed my last name to my mom’s maiden last name. I know that it was still my grandfather’s name, but it was something.

Yes! I’m sure the actual food is good too, but I would kill for a Monop ham sandwich right now.

I feel like I am spending a ton on these stupid little bribes to get my kid to use the potty. He earns new books (in the $2 to $4 range) and t-shirts ($5 to $8). Individually they cost next to nothing, but it is adding up.

Agreed. I bought a minivan with one kid because I was so goddamn sick of fitting his carseat and all his stuff in my tiny Honda Fit and driving with my own knees jammed up under the steering wheel. At least it turns out the Odyssey gets better gas mileage. I regret nothing.

Yep. I’ve been to Paris twice. The first time I tried to do the super important touristy things and hated it. The second time I spent most of my time drunk by a fountain, eating sandwiches from the convenience store, and watching Supernatural in my hotel room. It was perfect and I loved every second of it.

I’m going to have to disagree with you on this one. I expected to be completely underwhelmed by the Mona Lisa, but I was blown away. I found it to be pretty extraordinary in real life, which I never expected. And maybe I just had great luck but the Louvre wasn’t super-crowded when I went so I was able to spend many…

I recently moved to the Midwest from DC. I am unreasonably excited about my kid’s future 4H projects.

I read it at tattoo “jewelry” being more practical than real bangles. Because kids yank on that shit.

I think you should keep James Tiberius in your back pocket as an option for kid #2. This is said as the mother of a little H. Gallifrey.

I got one of these for my brother last Christmas. It was kind of a “haha, I will get you something stupid-expensive that you don’t want or need, but you’ll have to keep it around so that I see it when I visit” gift. I hope he accidentally puts in in the dishwasher and has to buy a new one. I am not a very nice sister.…

Ouch. As an HR manager, I’m proud to say that everyone I hire to work in HR has to pass an Excel test. No counting cells, no hand keying. No passing grade unless you know how to use all the basic formulas, and no perfect score without successful use of both VLOOKUP and SUMIFS (we all have our favorites). I will gladly…

You don't. Old Navy maternity runs big, but other than that, you just get to wear ill-fitting messes.

I am so happy that my company (in the US) pays for 2 weeks of paternity leave, to be used any time in the baby's first year. Same for adoptive parents. It is still shamefully little, but better than most.

I've been a workplace smoker and am now a workplace pumper. I am much more conscious about the time I spend pumping than I ever was about the time I spent smoking, but haven't gotten comments on either from my employer.

I don't play Candy Crush, but play similar casual games while I am breastfeeding in the middle of the night. It keeps me from falling asleep on top of my baby. I can't think of a lot of other excuses, though.

I'll stick with my soap with a prize inside!

I haven't previously heard that fan theory. Now I need to re-read everything with that in mind.