Side note: my wife has a joke law degree from Costco up in her office with her named spelled phonetically.

The Kennedy Center really is a top-tier venue and half the price of shows in New York, according to some statistics I just made up. The only other major city I'd lived in before was Seattle, so it was all new to me. I can definitely see why you didn't think much of DC at first, though.

This made me chortle for an unreasonably long time.

I was glad to leave, but actually kind of miss it now. I just started House of Cards and I have to stifle my nostalgia during the opening credits.

Do you live in the District, Scrawler? Mrs. Balls and I moved from Adams Morgan to Seattle last May.

Oh man, a friend of mine posted a similar meme on FB comparing the "manliness" of Tsar Putin to Obama and said something borderline treasonous like "Don't you wish our President was this much of a man?

*Colmes watches that scene from Scanners, has elaborate fantasy about Hannity having catastrophic aneurysm*

What is the deal with slaves and fried chicken? I mean, we don't give them adequate access to proper nutrition or enough calories to properly perform heavy physical labor for no compensation, but c'mon, eat a vegetable once in a while! Anyway, what else is going on?

White is for surrender to the Secret Muslim Underground. WAKE UP, SHEEPLE.

IT WAS THE END OF MAJOR COMBAT OPERATIONS IN IRAQ, MAGICRAT. DA-DOI!

I'm a mainline Protestant and I've gotten the aren't-you-cute pat on the head on these comment boards and in other places before, too. You and @avclub-58b5e1181aef482ae9d3f57afb3baa76:disqus seem really cool about people trashing your religious beliefs, and I kind of envy you (and I'm sorry you have to deal with…

I grew up in western Washington State, and I'd put it up there as one of the top-five prettiest states in the nation, but I remember being LOTR-style dumbstruck when I first saw the Tetons on a clear day. But my coworker, who lived a lot of her life in Cody, said the high plains in the eastern part of the state are…

I belong to a mainline Protestant church, and I have always found Mormons way nicer than Evangelicals. All of us Christians rely on some fantastical mythology in order to continue in our religions, and Mormons seem super self-aware and magnanimous about it. That South Park episode about the Mormon family was really…

Mrs. Balls and I are seeing it for the first time this May in Manhattan. We're really looking forward to it — we tried going when we actually lived on the east coast but the shows were always sold out months in advance.

I thought it was someplace in Malaysia or Indonesia and felt insecure about my global geography knowledge because I couldn't place the name.

I just had lunch with a high school friend who is an attorney in SLC. She loves it for the outdoorsy stuff, but she and her boyfriend are actively trying to get back to Seattle and away from people who legitimately believe that all Democrats are Active Baby Murderers. I think she'd probably agree with you.

I just started catching Mrs. Balls up on Community and in season one (Social Psychology, I think) there's a big "Sign up for the AV Club here!" sign (or something along those lines). It seemed a little too well-framed to just be a throwaway set piece.

Well, I could knock her over.

I could also see it as being almost totally numb to a close familial loss at this point, but yeah, you need Maggie to actually say the lines for it to make sense. Maybe it's in the deleted sce… fuck, who am I kidding.

Ah, yeah, that's what it is. I was trying to get at this above but couldn't remember enough about the civil side to be confident about it.