Funny enough, we’re getting more SP throwback shooters now than we did in the actual 90s. 

Look, I just want the rights to The Michigan Rag and Batdance. 

Well, I did, but I threw them at Ed Sheeran, who you’ll be glad to know had nothing but kind things to say about their shape. 

Can we stop throwing shit at performers period? I don’t care if it’s a phone, a pair of panties or a 3D print of Armand Assante’s nipples. Unless they specifically ask to have something thrown on stage, maybe let the musicians do the thing they’re there to do. 

It feels like there’s a new American Pie direct-to-video sequel every time I look, does that count? 

Oh, has there ever! Some even tell of moderate-to-vigorous hornswogglin’, as well as hoodwinkery of indeterminate intensity! 

Oh, come now. Flim-flammers? Sure. Swindlers? Certainly. Ne’er-do-wells? Absolutely. A coupla sticky-fingered slippery Susans? And how. Fucking grifters? Preaching to the choir.

BABEAH!!!!!

Yeah, I think those crazy kids have a hell of a future ahead of ‘em. 

How long can a show that I stubbornly presume is about a talking lasso go for, anyway?

I’m sure we all already know, but this is as good a time as any to remind everyone of Kid Rock’s contributions to the Osmosis Jones soundtrack, because it still breaks my brain 20 years after the fact. Funny that all the Trumpster Fires accuse everyone on the left of being Epstein’s buddies when their guy is literally…

I checked out the moment I realized that it wasn’t a Cop Rock prequel. 

Must-See Deity

If that’s what’s got your dander up, the internet might not be for you. And for god’s sake, never watch a comedy film or standup special. 

Sup upon the finest of dicks, Phil. 

When did I say it was? No, seriously, point to the part where I said anything that would make your response make sense. 

Seconded. He was the third wheel on his own damn song.

He keeps makin’ em, I’ll keep watching. 

Okay, but what bearing does that have on a man finding happiness in the body he feels most comfortable in? Are you on the wrong article?

I’m only slightly interested in the movie itself (superhero fatigue is hitting me *hard*... I don’t even care about the next Batman movie, and I fucking love Batman), but I cannot wait to see the reviews on this thing.