Sounds like it’s Blockbuster’s time to shine! 

Damn, way too young. (seriously though, RIP to a legend)

Nester’s Funky Bowling seems like the obvious next step. 

Bad enough that those execrable “talkies” put Clara Bow outta work, now this? My own damn ‘putey-box wants to talk at me!? I spit on the very idea!

I can’t recall which movie shattered my illusions first, I was very noncritical as a kid, but I do remember being quite disappointed in the first Mortal Kombat movie. (thankfully I didn’t see Annihilation until adulthood, it might have killed my love for the franchise completely otherwise)

Eh, my can opener also opens cans, and it doesn’t have Johnny Depp all over it. 

I’ve cooled on Scott Pilgrim over the years, but my old love for it has me very excited about this. 

Baby shark, pop-pop pop-pop pop!

Feck outta heah, Jennifer. There’s edgy comedy everywhere, it remains popular and successful, and before you Say The Thing, yes, Blazing Saddles could indeed get made today. 

I’ll defend RE6 for one aspect: The Mercenaries mode is super fun. 

As the biggest VR apologist I know: The “metaverse” truly is massively stupid, and was never going to be anything more than VRChat with the fun sanitized out of it. It still baffles me that Zuck thought he could blow everyone’s minds with a VR Mii like it was something new. 

Tetris schmetris, the real excitement would be in a 1993tris movie.
Does Tetris have “G U N”? I think not.

Not to let “shiny new game” bias color it too much, but RE4make might just be the most fun I’ve ever had with this series, and this is coming from someone who never thought super highly of the original RE4 (and who absolutely loves the other remakes, 7, and Village). It’s just so ridiculously well-made. Cannot…

Huh.

Afroman is a damn delight of a man, fuck everyone involved in that raid. They deserve the humiliation. 

That’s awfully generous; I don’t think most AVC staff have any cultural touchstones predating *checks watch* six or seven minutes ago. 

Pshhh, humans? Come on now, those don’t exist.

Jack Black’s Sac Axed Lest Rest See Yellow Testes

It’ll certainly be interesting seeing the survivors teabag and flashlight spam the killers in live action.

We all do, my caffeinated friend. We all do.